How old are we, really?

Hey there, Sunday Morning Coffee-ites I trust you’ve had a fabulous week, and if not, that you’re caring for yourself today, taking deep breaths, getting ready to rock it this week. My week was a whirlwind. It’s grant season, you know, so putting together applications for a number of grants plus talking on a couple of projects with intense deadlines has left me feeling a little depleted. All of these seemed like a great idea when I said yes. Isn’t that the way? Or maybe that’s just me. I say yes, I beat myself up during the process, then feel a sense of accomplishment when I’m done, albeit exhausted. You’d think I would outgrow that weird process, but you know…no matter where I go, there I am.

One theme that ran through my last couple of weeks was this idea of age. My sister and I tried to remember things from childhood this week like, what was mom’s college major, what happened to a couple of our family dogs, and replacing our family’s boathouse that my sis and bro-in-law have taken on. Memory lane can be great, but it’s a fickle road when you realize you can’t remember events you thought you’ve known your whole life.

In the class I teach at GWU this week, our guest speakers were all men who’d been sentenced to life as juveniles but are home now on thoughtful second chance-type legislation. One of the gentlemen, who’s 40 something now and has only been home a short while, stated that in so many ways he feels like he’s still 16, trying to navigate a world that kept going for everyone else but stood still for him over the past 30 years. Can you imagine how lost that feeling must be?

And on top of all this busy-ness, I was under the weather. Do you catastrophize when you’re sick? Suddenly, I remember every mistake, every misstep, and every slight I may have dished out over my lifetime and agonize over them. Doubt. Rumination. What am I doing and why do I think I can do it???

Man. It’s the pits. It’s a battle to remind yourself that you’re just feeling icky and that everything is fine. Better than fine. You’re good. Life is great. You’re unbelievably lucky and blessed.

This is a skill, though, isn’t it? The ability to stop the madness in your mind and body and breathe…remind yourself that what you’re feeling and thinking is false and temporary…to acknowledge thoughts and then let them go, without hopping on that bus and going to town on it.

That’s what we call Emotional Intelligence (EI). Simply put, it's the ability to recognize, understand, and manage our own emotions, as well as understand and influence the emotions of others. Think of it as a toolkit for navigating the complex world of feelings, both our own and those of the people around us.

Now, you might be wondering, "How does EI relate to teaching?" Well, let me tell you—it's a game-changer! As educators, we're not just teaching academic and vocational subjects; we're also helping to shape the whole person. And that includes helping our students develop their emotional intelligence.

So, how can we do that?

Foster a Safe and Supportive Environment: Creating a classroom where students feel safe expressing their emotions is key. Encourage open communication, active listening, and empathy. Let your students know that it's okay to feel whatever they're feeling and that you're there to support them.

Teach Emotional Literacy: Help your students build their emotional vocabulary by introducing them to different emotions and teaching them how to identify and label their feelings. You can use activities like mood meters, emotion wheels, or journaling prompts to explore emotions in depth.

Practice Self-Regulation Techniques: Teach your students strategies for managing their emotions in healthy ways. This could include deep breathing exercises, mindfulness activities, or positive self-talk. Encourage them to take a step back and think before reacting impulsively.

Promote Social Awareness: Help your students develop empathy and perspective-taking skills by encouraging them to consider the feelings and experiences of others. Engage in discussions about diversity, equity, and inclusion to broaden their understanding of different perspectives.

Model Emotional Intelligence: As educators, we're not just teaching concepts—we're modeling behaviors. Be mindful of how you express and manage your own emotions in front of your students. Show them what healthy emotional regulation looks like in action.

By incorporating these strategies into our teaching practice, we not only help our students succeed academically but also equip them with essential life skills that will serve them well beyond the classroom. Remember, building emotional intelligence is a journey, and every step you take to support your students along the way makes a difference, no matter the age of your students or where you teach them (public school, home school, college campus, correctional facility).

So, here's to fostering a classroom where emotions are embraced, understood, and valued. And here’s to creating these conditions for ourselves, remembering that self-care is the first job of every teacher (insert any profession and any role here).

And if you’re under the weather, remember that you’re brilliant, kind, and yes…you can do it! Just let those nasty seff-doubts roll on by.